Basic 2 move: Open Reverso
This technique is particularly suited to dealing with negativity. Once you detect a negative word or statement, you need only place a Reverso to extract a preferable positive one. It is then a lot easier to be constructive. Variants include Simple Reverso, Double Reverso and Open Reverso, which is the most neutral and usually the most destabilizing of the variants. A common follow-up move to a Reverso is an S.O.S. (e.g. “What would you suggest?”)
Open Reverso leaves the space open for your partner to insert their own positive direction. If they use a double negative, you can follow up with Ki-no Nagare:
Partner: “You’ve got to be the most naïve person I know!”
Practitioner: “And you’d feel better if I was…?”
Partner: “Not naive!”
Practitioner: “Tell me more about what that would look like…”
It is hard for your partner to avoid bringing out a positive word that you can then use to orient the exchange positively. Know anyone who complains a lot? Next time you find yourself with someone persisting in negativity, ask them “What is/was missing?” – it is surprisingly effective.
Examples of the Technique “Open Reverso“
Intention: Ascertain a preferred positive direction
What would you prefer?
What would be a better direction then?
What would you like to see more of?
So instead of that, more…?
And you’d be more aligned with what?
So, what would be more desirable/interesting/beneficial for you?
What would make you feel more comfortable?